The attempts to manipulate others isn’t right nor does it feel good, like you’re taking advantage, this regardless how morally correct you are. There are ways on how you can win over others effectively, politely, and fairly. Methods which makes everyone feel satisfied.
Winning, convincing others to your point of view isn’t an easy task to do, especially if they don’t like you, or they didn’t get their fair share or a good deal.
The art, the ability to be able to apply persuasion tactics to friends and foes alike, becomes a necessary task.
On a daily basis, regardless of who you are, what your station in life is, we’re always negotiating.
We’re faced with exercises of convincing or persuading others, usually to what your point of view is. Every day, what we face is resistance.
My Point Of View
Whether it be paving your way on a business deal, closing in on a sale, speaking with vendors or a customer service rep, asking your child to behave.
We’re faced daily with negotiating to alter the outcome to your favor. Hoping everyone gets a fair deal, is an extremely delicate operation.
Keep in mind winning anyone over isn’t about manipulating, lying, or cheating them, twisting their arm to do things your way.
Instead, what it involves is giving them valid reasons to respect you, give them reasons so they’ll want to engage with you, listen to what you have to say.
To get immediate and long term results, the key lies in helping people to make decisions which are in their best interests.
To do this as consistently and efficiently as possible, what it takes is influencing others to your point of view.
Pull To Become More Influential
What influence involves is the ability to activate someone, or a group of people such as your audience to a desired action, your desired action, within the context of a desired goal.
What you need is pull. Most have heard someone saying, “Wow, is Sally ever influential, but she’s much too pushy!”
What you don’t want is to rub people the wrong way, but instead you want to pull, gravitate them towards you with kindness, tact, and excellent communication or writing skills.
Think who you consider to be great influencers. Think of those in business, on television, politics, or on the Internet who has the ability to pull you.
What they do is attract, gravitate people towards them and their ideas, without aggression.
Notice they’re able to do so because they focus on what the best benefits are, for those who they’re attempting to influence. There’s absolutely no manipulation or coercion involved.
You can also do the same, get the results you want while making them feel good about themselves by you knowing the process, even if they don’t necessarily like you.
Acknowledge Their Ego
People always want to feel good about themselves. If you make someone feel better about their current station in life, then you’re a step closer to pulling them to your side.
Never embarrass, shame, insult, or cajole them. Be careful regarding sarcastic tongue-in-cheek humor.
If you need to say, “I’m just kidding” then it wasn’t funny and no one’s laughing.
Keep Your Emotions In Check
It’s usually up to you, it’s always your choice what you say or act when needing to deal with a potential adversary. It’s your choice to respond either rationally or react emotionally.
Never become influenced or controlled by outside forces, sources or circumstances.
Respond as calmly as possible rather than letting your emotions to get in the way, feelings to get the better of you.
What doing so does is it places others on the defensive, rather than drawing them towards your ideals.
Never Be Confrontational
What people instinctively want is to react and respond to others positively.
So it’s best to approach any potential conflict from a point of resolution, benevolence, and being helpful. Then they’ll usually follow suit.
Reach out to them with a genuine smile, pleasant countenance, and a friendly “Hello, how are you?” You can frame your influence based on how you approach your initial conversation.
Invest a bit of time towards asking them questions about who they are first, their interests, family, their business etc.
Once they begin to open up and feel good about themselves, they will then be more open to listen to you.
Understand Their Beliefs
Everyone operates on their own subconscious set of beliefs, ideals, and the experiences that they’ve had.
These are usually completely different from your own, so realize this. You can avoid any misunderstandings or confusion which can stand in the way, when you’re attempting to influence.
Once you become more aware of how certain belief systems can drive their motivation and choices, your ability to relate more positively while persuading them will improve.
Communicate With Empathy And Gratitude
Every step of this process plays a key vital role, but what may be the most important is showing tact, showing empathy by knowing the exact thing to say at the right time.
What doing so makes all the difference, when it comes to moving, altering, convincing people to see your point of view. To voluntarily pull them towards you, your side of the issue.
What doing so results in is they taking the appropriate desired action, which benefits everyone concerned.
So revise, alter your speech if you need to before you speak.
Make sure you ask yourself the following question: How will they feel regarding what I am about to say, as well as how I’m about to say it?
Always show empathy and gratitude. Master these important people skills which are guaranteed to get you ahead of the game.
Learning to influence others without coercion or manipulation, will make your life a lot more enjoyable, profitable, and less stressful.