How To Recognize And Ignore The Drama Queens In Your Life
We all have those dramatic people in our lives, you know the ones who thrive and feed on constantly creating chaos everywhere they go, intentional or not. Once you recognize them, what you want to do is steer clear away from their theatrics.
These individuals do so to point attention to themselves as they feel deprived, as they’ll create instant dramatics on demand in practically everything that they do. They thrive on adding fuel to the fire, stirring up conflict and controversy when it’s not needed or deserved.
They’re in our families, there’s always one in our group of friends, and there’s always someone without fail at the workplace. These are the people who seek out attention for their own sake, since doing so is the only way they know how to get attention, screaming look at me.
The Signs Of Those Who Become To Dramatic
What you’ll notice is that the drama creating person always needs to be the focal point, they’ll play the victim or the hero, tell you what to do, become a bully. “Look what you did to me,” they exclaim. “Hey, this happened to me and it’s your fault.”
You’ve seen and heard this too many times before in the past. The person in the restaurant who’s loud, receives their food and then manages and insists vehemently that there’s something wrong with it. The lady who intentionally holds up a long line at the grocery checkout stand because the price of her food item was scanned wrong.
The sibling or the mother-in-law who constantly blows everything out of proportion, just so they they could get some adventure and attention in their otherwise bland lives. There’s a list of drama tactics which are literally endless.
The good news is that we have a choice to avoid this. We don’t have to get sucked into their vortex, to be swallowed into their one man show, their pathetic “look at me” stance.
Removing Yourself To Avoid The Drama
What we want to desperately do is remove this drama, the unwanted noise, the pointless sideshow from our lives because we prefer calm. The drama just becomes too annoying and a time waster.
It can even become uncomfortable at times just to be in the same space with these individuals. But you have the choice on whether you want to participate or not, this by becoming a silent observer.
Becoming silent simply means just that. Just observe without attaching any of your emotions to the situation. This can be difficult especially if it’s a family member or a close friend, and their focus is directed towards you, that they’re picking a fight.
The Tactics Of The Dramatic
Then it becomes yet more difficult if you’re the target of their projection. But keep in mind that the person who’s creating the drama is really doing so just to prove that they’re more important than you.
In order to not get caught in their path, you need to consciously remind yourself to not add any fuel to their fire. Just learn to ignore their rants, raves, complains, or they blaming you or everyone else and not surprisingly, never themselves. They’re perfect remember.
Keep in mind that this is their stage, their platform, their play to get more attention. But stand firm, hold your ground and just listen and ignore if possible. They will constantly attempt to bait you by saying things making it feel like a personal attack.
But realize that’s their motive, to get under your skin, they want you to play their game, for you to be drawn onto their stage, so they could attack back.
Just Become An Observer
Once you learn to just sit back and listen without giving feedback, what you’re doing is snuffing out their fire which frustrates them. If you just choose to ignore them, then their enthusiasm wears out since they’re easily distracted.
Then they have nothing to create further drama about since they have no one to play with. Those dramatics need others to participate, as they need fellow individuals that will play their role.
The Never Ending Story
But they’ll just usually move onto another topic where the drama starts again, as it becomes an endless cycle. It can begin again by they gossiping about you or someone else, and the new show starts.
Always keep in mind that they always want to focus all of the attention back on themselves somehow, this to get their fix. So just continue to ignore them by not giving attention to their new complaints, remain a silent observer.
Eventually, since you’re no longer what they’re looking for and you’re clearly not interested, they’ll turn away because you don’t want to play along. They can’t provoke you any further.
Just Be Better
During all this, since you know this person, what you hope to do is attempt to reform them by hoping that they dig deeper into their core self being, and correct their dysfunctional ways.
But most often, you as a silent observer should just continue to listen without input with the hopes that they’ll somehow change their energy on their own, to bringing peace and calm into every situation and other lives.
But first, you yourself need to determine if you’re a listener, or you like to provoke the drama for no good reason. It’s your choice, just make the right one.