It happens in every society and civilization on earth, to every culture in the world, that a certain group of people for one reason or another, just won’t like you or like each other. This ingrained in the fabric of our human arrogance. This when you’re a little different, and all that you want is to make friends, be liked.
So you put yourself out there trying to make friends, and there’s no one who wants to courtesy you back, making you eventually think that there’s something wrong with you, and become self conscious as a result.
Some will go through this torment of self doubt, especially during their school years, which continues on as young adults. All that they’re searching for is to be accepted by their peers, to be part of the hip crowd. We all become victims of ourselves and the pack mentality which most partake in.
Once you find that someone you’re attempting to be friends with doesn’t like you, rejected again, what it does is leaves a dent in your self esteem.
How Others View Themselves
Those who may have low self-esteem issues are convinced that their peers just don’t like them, even if there’s no real evidence for this belief. And know because of this, these individuals may actually be surrounded by those who genuinely like them, but just don’t realize it.
They are genuinely liked, yet, because they just don’t believe that they’re worthy of having their friendship, they become convinced that it’s done out of pity. So, if you think that nobody likes you, then find some real evidence to justify that they don’t, or you may just have a negative perception of yourself.
At times, it’s true that some people you meet will actually dislike you, this even once you initially make the social overtures and extend your friendship, and there’s reasons why this occurs.
Some Just Won’t Physically Like You
You may of been born or have moved into a society or culture where the community is extremely tight knit, and they don’t open up to newcomers, someone who appears a little different.
You may be surrounded by a group of people who automatically dislikes people because of their particular religion, appearance, ethnicity, especially if you’re a visible minority.
You may be surrounded by those who’ll reject you just because of the clothes you wear, because of those tattoos and nose ring, or you don’t obey to conventional wisdom.
It’s also been known that children and drunks will always tell the truth, they don’t have a lie filter, being completely honest in whatever they say. Then there’s the conformists, who can be extremely cruel to those who are slightly different from the norm.
Sadly, some never grow out of their prejudice when judging others, this for their own superficial reasons.
It’s Not Hardly Your Fault
So feeling down and negative on yourself, especially when it’s not your fault could potentially activate a downward spiral of self-doubt. You might also turn your anger outwards into bitterness or revenge towards others. Realize this isn’t the solution which will win you friends, or give you peace of mind.
It becomes important just to take a good hard look at yourself, the way you interact with others, and how they see you. There may be a specific behavior that’s causing them to dislike you, a behavior which you can change.
Altering Behavior To Be More Liked
Ask yourself if you have an issue with any of the following, and if you decide to change any of these behaviors, others may begin liking your more.
• Do you always come across as extremely negative and complain all the time. Most find this behavior annoying and may avoid you
• Do you actively participate in conversations, or do you keep silent quiet and allow others to do all the talking or starting these conversations. If so, then learn on improving your skills, making others be more interested in you
• Do you endlessly talk about yourself while showing little interest in anyone else whom you’re talking with. They’ll just become bored with your narcissistic attitude, this once they realize you’re just interested in yourself
• Do you try too hard to please others, always agreeing with everything that that they say, and never offer any opinions of your own. If you don’t respect yourself, then others won’t respect you back
• Do you often say things which will hurt their feelings, and tell them later that you were just kidding. Do you say annoying things which may be considered “mean” behind other people’s backs. After a while, no one will trust you, thinking that you’re just an unkind person.
How To Be A Better Friend
If you’re wanting to make friends with others, it becomes important that you don’t give up trying. Continue to approach people who interests you, those you have something in common with, and try striking up a conversation.
Recognize and get rid of all your bad social habits if they’re getting in the way of creating friendship. If you’re given the cold shoulder by the majority of the people you encounter, then continue to keep looking for those who you can confide in, and be friends with.
Always be working in developing your social skills, appearance, and talents, mining all of the good qualities about yourself, so you can transform yourself in a new way to attract others, those who you have mutual respect with.
Continue to actively search out those who’ll like you and accept you for who you are, just be yourself and the friends will be there.
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